Bedrooms are private sanctums and should by definition provide refuge from the world at large and a retreat from the demands of our public selves. At the very least, they should offer a place of safety and rest. Rather than luxuries, they are in my opinion, bare minimums in order to feel well and function at your best. With all the pressures to do more and faster, we need this nesting spot more than ever to counter stress levels, heal wounds and recharge our creative energies.

I don’t think most Americans put enough effort into the quality of support systems within their bedrooms. Things such as having the most comfortable bed you can afford, the softest sheets you can buy,  30”oversized down pillows to support the head if you are a reader, soft light if you are a talker, enough lamps so that overhead lighting is NEVER necessary, eastern light that awakens you without  the need for an alarm clock, a touch of silk to keep it alluring, a down comforter on top of you and a down mattress cover beneath you, at least four down pillows, your favorite books,  tea service and tray,  fresh flowers, artwork, an armoire, a desk, two comfortable chairs or an ottoman for removing one’s shoes, a soft rug, candles and time to nestle – are all part of a symphony of nourishment and rebirth, a rekindling of the spirit for the next day.

 

 

Review the emotions coming from your bedroom. Is it puritanical and sterile which might be telling in and of itself? Is it a messy heap of unaddressed issues? Is it so large that it feels cold, empty and unprotected? Either way, it speaks to what you think you deserve and how you nourish your inner self.

Think of this room in the house as being the most beneficial for your spirit.

Start from there.

Seeing as the sun has graced us with a bit more each day, let’s talk lighting this month. With the lack of light in the winter, most of us turn to sugar, caffeine or shopping to get us through the dull, grey days. But what if I told you that just investing in some gorgeous lighting would affect your mood far more than any of those fixes? It’s true.

If I had to name the one thing that clients neglect but which makes a colossal difference in any space, it would be lamps. Low, structured, opulent lamp light acts like the frame on an artful corner. Or, it can create a corner in the middle of nothing with its tender blush of light. Allow the luminescence to pull you into a  chair and melt into its soft hum. And while I adore gorgeous chandeliers and pendants, they do not come close to offering the same intimacy gradient that every well planned space needs to feel welcoming. Lighting from chandeliers and pendants shout one thing, lamps whisper another. Sconce lights are breathy punctuation but that’s another blog.

Now let’s talk beauty. Don’t just reuse your mother’s old lamps unless she happens to be my mother. And don’t think you can go out and buy one or two generic lamps for $30 each and feel inspired. Lamps should be works of art from the base to the shade and you need groupings not one per room.  And please, throw away anything other than a silk shade. You deserve nothing less in the sanctuary you call home. Considering they are a lifetime possession for most of us, invest in something you LOVE.

If you know me, you know I love dark chocolate. And for those of you who can relate to food beyond mere appreciation but rather amorous devotion, you will want to try this flourless chocolate cake recipe from one of my favorite cookbooks, My French Kitchen (2vol) by Joanne Harris .  It is one of those recipes that has become almost illegible in the book due to my obsessive use. My children will have little trouble identifying which cookbooks and specific recipes I have grown to love as the stains and dog-eared pages are obvious markers.  This cake is simple in regards to preparation and isn’t anything fussy that requires a cake server and fine china. Most definitely, it will fix anything that has gone wrong in the day if eaten warm, right out of the pan. I promise.

Gateau Lawrence

6 ½ ounces (70% cocoa) chocolate – I personally buy dark chocolate bars w/ sea salt

12 Tablespoons unsalted butter (softened)

2/3 cups sugar or less

1 2/3 cups of ground almonds (Trader Joes sells large bags)

4 large eggs (separated)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Break chocolate into small pieces. Melt on stovetop at lowest setting in a heavy bottomed saucepan. Remove from heat. Cream together butter (room temp) and sugar. Add ground almonds, egg yolks, melted chocoate and beat until evenly blended. Beat egg whites until stiff and fold into batter gently. Poor into a cake pan ( I like a fluted 9” tart pan) and bake 35 minutes.

It will have a light crust on the outside but the inside will be soft with a moist, dense sponge.  It should neither be dry nor goey. The book calls for a chocolate icing but personally, I think it is overkill. Typically, my children and I eat this right out of the oven gathered around the kitchen island. The sighs and smiles are gateways to open hearted conversations. But sometimes, I make this just for me and eat it in bed with a good book and cup of tea. Happy Valentines!